The Scissors that Attacked My Security Blanket

My hair has been hacked.

I’d been growing it out for a year.  And then BAM.  Halle Berry short.  And I’m weirdly OK with it.

See, my hair is not so much an accessory as it is a covering.  A shield. A way to disguise the breakouts that have plagued me since Amy Grant’s ‘House of Love’ album was the soundtrack of my life.

You know the funny thing?  That security blanket of hair did not give me one extra ounce of security. I have said no to friends, no to guys, no to God, all because of what that wall of hair was supposedly covering.  Surely my girlfriend must want to hang out with someone else.  He’s just after my best friend.  God can find someone way more capable than me.

A few years ago I got fed up.  I actually considered how thrilled the enemy must be with my wallflower ways.  A lot of use I was to the Kingdom when I was yelling at God to just fix me, and then I would do whatever He wanted me to.

So I decided to stick it to the devil, and chop away every ounce of that security blanket.  Friends thought I was brave, but really, it was an act of desperation.

What I left in hair on the floor of my hairdresser’s salon, I gained in confidence.  With my face fully exposed, I had nothing to hide.   And when you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to lose.  I went out with my friends.  I said yes to whatever God threw at me.  My husband was stunned (and thrilled) with my newfound chutzpah.

When I got pregnant last year, I thought I would take advantage of all those preggo hormones and grow my hair out.  But as it grew, I found myself reverting back to my please-don’t-look-at-me ways.  And it freaked me out a little.  Enough so that yesterday I found myself back in my hairdresser’s chair, asking her to just do away with it all.  And while the newly exposed face staring back at me was a bit startling, I welcomed her back.

Security blankets come in all forms.  Some women, like me, hide behind their hair.  For others it can be their weight, the color black, sarcasm, make-up, or pride.  Do you have something in your life that’s holding you back from being fully you?  Fully His?

Your friends and family deserve to experience the real you, without barriers.  And your Creator?  Even more so.  He wants to see YOU.  That strong, beautiful, stick-it-to-devil woman He intended you to be

So let’s bust out those scissors, shall we?

4 thoughts on “The Scissors that Attacked My Security Blanket

  1. Pingback: on why i have a mullet « megan gahan

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